Where were You?
by brevhalder
Summary: Elena's a vampire now. Damon is gone. It's just her and Stefan now. Can she handle the loss of her best friend and almost lover?
1. Echo

Chapter 1 Echo

Elena sat in the middle of the living room. She clung to a blanket, wrapping it around her like she needed the warmth. She was a vampire now. It took a toll on the young girl. Her words echoed in her head and with every repetition it grew louder. _I don't want to be a vampire. I never wanted to be one._ She felt truly alone now. Yes, she had Stefan, but Damon was gone. She didn't feel whole anymore. Elena grew too close to Damon over the fall. She was starting to feel something for him. There was no denying it and everyone could see it, she was too scared to admit it. If she admitted it, it would make her just like Katherine. _It's okay to love them both. I did._

A loud thud erupted through the house and Elena jumped. She turned around and tried to focus on where the noise came from. A bright flash of light entered the house and she turned her head to the windows in the kitchen. No doors were open. The house was completely silent. Then the thud came rolling in and it clicked in Elena's brain that it was thundering outside. She walked over to the kitchen and picked up her phone. She started scanning through her contacts. She kept scrolling down and stopped at one name. One little name. **Damon**. Her thumb moved over to hit call but she knew it wouldn't do her any good. He wouldn't come. He was gone. She kept scrolling down faster until she hit Stefan. She didn't hesitate to hit call. She listened to it ring and bit down on her lip. The phone made a click noise and Stefan's voice followed it. "Elena? Is everything okay?" he asked. She shook her head, "No. Nothing is okay," she said and tried to hold back tears. "Can you come over? I don't want to be alone," she pleaded. "Yeah of course. I'll be right over," he said. "I love you, Stefan," she said. "I love you too," he replied and hung up the phone.

She set it down on the counter and walked up into her room. Elena looked at her bed, half expecting Damon to be there holding onto her bear and laying down on her bed. She swore she saw him. He had a ghost appearance and when she blinked her eyes it was gone. Her bear was sitting in between her pillows just like she had left it. There was a knock at the door and she turned her head around and looked at the door then back at her bed. She knew it was Stefan. She rushed down the stairs and opened the doors. She rushed towards him and wrapped her arms around him. Stefan's shirt was soaking wet from the rain but it didn't matter to Elena. She needed someone to be with her. _I don't have anyone anymore._ A slightly cool pressure landed on top of her head and she tilted her head up slowly. "You're going to be fine, Elena," he assured her and unwrapped her arms from his waist. His hands brushed against the side of her face and he brought her lips to his. "It's just a thunderstorm," he reminded her. Elena gently pressed her lips back to Stefan's. "I know. I just don't want to be alone right now," she said. She stepped out of the way and let Stefan walk in before shutting the door behind him.

The young brunette sat down on the middle of the couch and wrapped herself back up in the dark brown blanket. She looked up at Stefan as he sat down next to her. She rested her head on his shoulder and he wrapped his arms around her. Letting her know that she was safe and not alone. _You have me_.

The two just sat there on the couch for hours, waiting for the storm to pass. Listening to the sound of each other's breaths. She didn't feel so alone with Stefan, but she still felt empty inside. The storm subsided and Elena pulled herself away from Stefan. "Thank you," she said, her voice caught in the back of her throat. "Anything for you," he assured her and kissed her gently. "I can stay if you want you know," he offered. She nodded her head. "I know, but I think I'll be fine," she said. She pulled herself off the couch and reached for Stefan's hand. They started walking towards the door and he kissed her one last time. "If you need me. I'm just a call away, okay?" he assured her. "I love you," he said. "Thank you," she said again. "I love you too," she said and tried to smile. Stefan gave a reassuring smile and started walking down the porch. She waited until he got into his red car to shut the door.

Elena heard the familiar sound of his car drive down the road before she slid down the door. Stefan was the person who made her feel alive again, why didn't he anymore? Her hand clutched at her chest and tears started rolling down her cheeks. The memories flooded back to her. The ones she woke up with when she first opened her eyes as a vampire_._ One stood out more than the other though. It wasthe first time he told her he loved her. _I just have to say it once. You just need to heart it. I love you, Elena. And it's because I love you that I can't be selfish with you. _He wasn't who everyone thought he was, but he didn't show it to anyone but her. He opened himself up to her. She broke down his walls but she kept rejecting him. This was her fault. This was her punishment for hurting him, for dragging him down with her. She wasn't going to try and find him like she tried to find Stefan. This was a decision that she would have to live with the rest of eternity. The painful loss of losing a best friend and almost lover.


	2. My Shadow, My Only Friend

Chapter 2 My Shadow, My Only Friend

Damon was used to this. He felt like he should be. Ever since Stefan was born it was all about him. His father was glad when he joined the confederacy, not because he joined the army, but because he would be gone. He wouldn't have to see his disappointment of a son. Damon would never be good enough for anyone.

He wandered through the dark forest the moon the only thing helping him see. He had no idea what town he was in. After that phone call with Elena and watching Alaric die in his arms he just got in the car and kept driving. He wasn't going to look back. He would never go back to Mystic Falls. The memories were too painful for him. It made him feel weak. He was also keeping his promise to his brother. _Let the better man win, brother_. "You'll always be the better man," Damon muttered under his breath. Saint Stefan, the good brother, and his demonic brother who couldn't do good. He didn't want to do good. He spent his human life trying to gain approval from his father to no avail. Now he was living for him. He wouldn't let anyone change that. He did before with Elena, but never again. You can't disappoint anyone if no one expects anything of you.

He would walk the earth alone for an eternity.

Damon walked to the outside edge of the forest and listened for a car to come by. He could hear a car rolling by it was just behind the curve. He started walking across the road and laid down across the yellow lines. The car kept rolling closer to him until he heard a squeal that came from the breaks. However he wasn't in the mood for a flat out fright. He stayed down on the road and waited for the driver to come out. "I'm not good enough," he muttered to himself. The woman walked over to him in a hurried panic. She knelt down beside him.

"Oh my god, oh my god. Are you okay? Do I need to call an ambulance?" she asked and started fumbling through her purse. Damon turned his head to the side and looked at her as she moved her long brown hair behind her ear as she fussed with her purse. He turned his head and looked up at the sky and sighed. "No. I'm not okay," he said. "Are you hurt? What happened? Is there anything I can do?" she asked and pulled her phone out of her purse. "Yes. I am," he said quietly. "And there is only one thing you can do," he said and pulled his torso off of the ground. "What is it? I'm calling for an ambulance right now," she said and pointed to the phone in her ear. "That won't help you," he said. The woman's eyebrows furrowed and shook her head, "What are you talking about? It's for you," she said. "No it won't be," Damon said. Veins broke through the skin under his eyes and branched down like roots of a tree. His upper lip twitched upward and exposed his fangs to the frightened woman. "This won't hurt if you don't move," he assured her as he leaned over the woman. Her brain registered what Damon was about to do just in time and she quickly pulled herself away and started running. He ran after the woman and stopped in front of her. "You really, really shouldn't have done that," he growled. He looked into her eyes. "Don't move," he compelled. The back of his hand brushed against the base of her neck and moved her hair out of the way. "I was going to let you live," he said. The veins reappeared, as did his fangs, and he tilted his head down and inhaled her scent. "But now I'm not," he said and bit into her neck.

**AN: Sorry for such a short chapter. I'm experimenting with a Damon POV, I've never really written him before so this is a stretch for me so feedback is encouraged **


	3. If You Love Something

Chapter 3 If You Love Something

_Dear Diary,_

_I shouldn't be like this. I'm not only talking about the fact that I'm a vampire now. It's just.. I can't even control my emotions. Stefan says I should have a bit of a better grip on them by now. It's been over three months. Maybe it's because of all the guilt I've been carrying. I've been holding everything in for too long. I'm used to Stefan and… Damon helping me with everything. They can't help me now. Not when it comes to my emotions and how I feel. How I feel towards both of them, how guilty I feel for everything that has happened. No one can help me with this. I just… have to accept everything and move on with my life. Sounds easier said than done though. It's not just my human life that I have things to feel guilty for. It's my new life too, my un-life. Damon is gone and it's all my fault. I didn't even get to say goodbye. When I got out of the hospital, after completing my transition, Stefan told me that Damon just upped and left._

_I didn't even get to say goodbye._

There was a knock at the door and Elena turned her head. She had a feeling it was Stefan, maybe Jeremy but the two were distant from each other right now. She was afraid she could accidentally hurt him and despite the Gilbert stubbornness that ran through the both of them, he understood that that's what she wanted. What she needed. All Jeremy wanted to do was to help her. He wanted to make this as easy for her as possible. It was hard enough the way it was without a stubborn brother.

She hid her journal under the mattress of her bed and walked down the stairs. Stefan was inviting himself into the house and she pulled a smile onto her face. "Hi," she said quietly and tucked a few strands of hair behind her ear. "I hope I wasn't barging in," he said. "I just wanted to see how you were doing. After yesterday and all," he said and shoved his hands in his pockets. Elena pursed her lips together in the form of a smile. "I'm fine. Much better," she lied. "Elena," Stefan growled and tilted his head slightly to her left. "I'm fine, Stefan!" she said, her voice sharpened slightly. She didn't want to explain it. She didn't know how to explain it. Who could understand? There was a hole in her and it took all the energy she had not to drive a stake through her own heart. It was her hope that was keeping her alive. She was hoping Damon would come back. Even if it was only for a day. Before she did anything she needed to say goodbye. They owed each other that.

"Um I'm hungry," she said. "Can we go hunting?" she asked. Elena hated hunting but it was the price she had to pay. She wouldn't let anymore innocent people get hurt because of her, let alone by her. "Yeah of course," Stefan replied. "Are you ready to go now?" he asked. She closed her eyes and nodded her head. "Yeah," she said and walked the rest of the way down the stairs.

The drive to the forest felt like it would go on for hours. The path was becoming too familiar by now. "Isn't there another place we can go? To you know…hunt?" she asked, turning her head away from the window and turned her attention to Stefan. "Well yeah, but they're a bit farther away and a little risky for you right now," he said. She rolled her eyes and looked out the window again. "If anyone should be worried about risks it should be you," she snarled. "Elena, I'm worried about you. That's all," Stefan said and placed his hand on her shoulder. She snapped his hand away from her and could see the look in his eyes. "Oh my god, Stefan, I'm so sorry," she recoiled and her hands covered her mouth. "I'm hungrier than I thought. I didn't mean it. You know that right?" she asked. Stefan nodded his head. "I'm fine, Elena. Let's just go and hunt okay?" He had the car parked right outside an old trail and he got out of the car. Elena got out and met with Stefan quickly. "I'll go that way," he said and pointed to the left. Stefan disappeared right after that and Elena stood still for a moment. She listened for a rabbit, maybe even a deer. She was feeling hungrier than usual.

There was a rustling noise coming from the right of Elena. She turned her head and could see a rabbit in the distance. She ran after it and it didn't take longer before the poor, grey rabbit fell victim to Elena's young, sharp fangs. Its blood rushed through Elena's throat and she could feel the rabbit's life leave its body and enter into hers. Small traces of blood dripped from the side of her mouth and she tilted her head up. It wasn't enough. Not quite yet. She needed more. She needed to feel whole again.

A deer could be heard off in the distance. Elena's attention quickly snapped awake and she rushed after it. She pinned the doe down and snapped it's hind leg to keep it down. She bit into her throat and could feel so much more power entering her. There was more blood in a deer than there was in a tiny rabbit. Even with the doe lying dead on the ground it wasn't enough. She still felt empty and she was craving to fill the gap. She needed to feel whole again. She need to feel like a whole person again and not just half of one.

Elena ran through the forest, going from one animal to the next until she ran into Stefan. He placed his arms on each side of her and held her still. She was covered in blood. Her lips were raining blood. Tiny droplets layered upon each other spread throughout her shirt. There were tears in her eyes and blood in her hair. "Make it stop, Stefan," she sobbed and he pulled her into his chest. He wrapped his arms around her and held her tight. "Everything is going to be okay," he said. She clutched at his shirt. "No it's not, Stefan. No one can. This is my fault. It's all my fault that he's gone," she said.


	4. Satellite

Chapter 4 Satellite

"So who's next?" Damon grinned and dropped the blonde girl limp on the old wooden floor. There was a chorus of "Pick me! Pick me!" coming from the other young, foolish women in the bar. He silently grinned to himself and rushed over to a young brunette. Brunettes were his flavor of choice right now, for obvious reasons. He looked at her delicate hand. The slight elevation on her arm where her arm connected with her wrist. He brought the wrist up to his mouth and his fangs teased along her skin. "Bite me!" she pleaded. "Do it," she begged. His lips smirked and the tip of his fang pierced into her wrist. There was a vibration coming from Damon's pant that stopped him though. He groaned and pulled it out of his pocket. **Stefan**.

"Ugh. Even when you're not here you're still annoying me," he groaned before answering the phone. "What do you want, Buzz Kill Bob?" he growled. "Come home, Damon," Stefan said. "And why should I do that? Where is that anyway? What is your definition of home? Is it the cutesy home is where the heart is or is it where you go to bed at night?" he rambled off in a drunken haze. "Damon," Stefan growled lightly. He wasn't in the mood for games. Stefan just wanted to help Elena who was clearly missing her… friend. Stefan hated knowing that he wasn't enough for Elena, not right now at least, but he wanted to see her happy right now. It was the only thing that was going to do her any favors in her beginning phases of vampirism. "What? Why should I go back?" Damon asked. "Elena needs you," the younger brother replied. The raven haired brother dropped the phone from his ear and rolled his eyes. "No she doesn't. I quote 'I have to let you go' One of the last words she ever spoke to me. She doesn't _need_ me. She needs you apparently even though you failed to do one thing. Keep her **alive**," he growled. "Now goodbye," he snapped and turned his phone off.

"Now where were we?" Damon grinned and exposed his fangs. The girls started squealing in joy and he smirked. The joys of being the eternal stud. He ran between two girls and wrapped his arms around their shoulders. He gave them each a grin, showing them each his fangs. He could see the excitement in their eyes and he brought the tan brunette closer to him. He kissed along the frame of her shoulder and down her shoulder blade. The girl fell into his arms and moaned. He let go of the pale blonde and focused all of his attention on the brunette in his arms. His lips traveled up her spine and the girl started shivering in his arms and a moan elicited from her mouth. "I thought you might like that," he smirked under his breath and teasingly bit into the side of her neck. "That's it. Deeper," she moaned and wrapped her arm around and placed it on the back of his neck, urging him to go deeper. "Anything you want," he grinned and bit deeper into her neck. The girl's moans grew louder the harder her pulled her blood out of her system. "How about we make this even more fun," he suggested and winked at her. She squealed and Damon took her hand, pulling her towards the pool table.

He propped up on the table, leaving his hands under her ass cheeks. He slowly inched her closer to him. Damon started kissing up her chest and nipped at her skin, leaving tiny bite marks on her skin. He'd get to them later. The girl's hands traveled up his back and she wrapped her legs around his waist. Her head was tilted back and with every tiny nip she moaned into the air. Damon's lips traveled up her neck and a quiet moan came from his mouth, "Elena." Thankfully the girl was too busy enjoying her own state of bliss. Damon didn't care at this point either. This was just another dumb sorority chick, who just so happened to have similar olive toned skin that Elena had and long flowing brown hair, she was just going to wind up being a box full of papers in the sheriff's department. He continued kissing up the side of her face, lips tracing her jaw line. The girl forced him to bring his lips onto hers and Damon tugged tighter on her ass. He felt the girl smirk into his lips until she let go of his face laid down slowly on the pool table. She looked up at him and giggled. "Well aren't you cute," he said and moved his hands out from underneath her. He crawled onto the table and kissed the edge of her neck. "And incredibly stupid," he said. There was a tug on the front of his pants and he tilted his head down. "Very. Very stupid," he smirked, tracing his fingers on her jaw line before he placed a kiss on her lips. He placed his legs on the side of her hip and sat up. Damon started tugging his shirt off and tossed it into the abyss. The girl's hands reached up and slid up his chest. "You like?" he smirked and removed her hands off his chest. "But now it's your turn," he said and tapped his index finger on her nose. "Okay," she grinned and sat up on the table in a slouched position and pulled it off. "Yoga?" he asked, admiring how seamlessly she took her shirt off without faltering. "Glad it's paying off," she said and laid back down on the rough green table. His hands traveled up her torso and he started kissing his way up her stomach, stopping just under her bra. He snuck his hands behind her back and unclasped her bra. She disposed herself of it and Damon wrapped his lips around her left breast and massaged the other. "Oh, Damon," she moaned and her hands latched onto his hair. "Yes, Elena?" he let slip. She propped herself up. "Elena? Who the hell is Elena?" she asked. Damon pulled himself up and looked into the brunette's dark green eyes. "You're going to let me call you Elena or any other name and you won't complain," he compelled.

"Now where were we?" he said and placed a kiss on her lips. The olive toned girl brought her in closer and pressed her bare chest up against his. She started moving with the kiss and forced both of them off the table. She removed her lips from his and slid down his chest and messed with the buckled on his belt and pushed his pants down to the ground. "Well someone is a little eager," she said noticing the tent building in Damon's pants. "What can I say?" he smirked. She snuck her hands underneath the waistband of his boxers and slowly tugged them down his legs. Her hand wrapped around his member and centimeter-by-centimeter her lips crept around his member before taking him mostly in. Damon was surprised by her forwardness but you wouldn't hear a complaint from Damon. A free, non-compulsion blowjob. Who would? He tilted his head back and groaned in delight. Her mouth was hot and moist and it almost felt like heaven to Damon, or wherever it was a vampire went when they died. There was one thing that he could think of that would be better though. She started moving back and forth and occasionally wrapped her tongue around his member. "Stop," he said. He could feel himself and they weren't going to get to the really fun part if she kept it up. He waited for her to complete unlatch herself from him before he brought her up to him. He pushed her jeans down, bringing her thong with it, and he propped her back up onto the table. Damon pushed her legs apart and lined himself up with her before he forcibly thrusted his member inside of her. He grunted as he thrusted into her once more. He laid her down on the table and he pulled on her legs so she could take him completely in. It didn't take long before he could feel her walls trembling around him and a few more thrusts later she completely came undone and Damon followed not far behind her. "Elena," he moaned, tilting his head back. Oh how he wished that it actually was.

"That was amazing," she exhaled. "I know it was," Damon smirked. He removed himself from her and she sat back up on the pool table. "I have one last treat for you," he said. "Oh and what is that?" she asked in anticipation. "Death," he grinned. "What?" she asked. "You heard me," he said and bit into her neck. He held her close, making resistance useless under him. He tasted every last drop of blood that came rushing out of her body. He kept her on him until her body turned cold. Damon grinned to himself and pushed her back down onto the pool table. He put his clothes back on and walked into the bathroom to clean up. He washed the spilt blood off of his face and he walked out of the empty bar. He got into his car and took off onto the desert road.


End file.
